I am often asked how someone can tell whether a spouse is hiding income or assets during a divorce. Sometimes the answer is obvious. A document surfaces. A bank statement shows up unexpectedly. A third party lets something slip. But more often, it starts with a feeling that something is not right.
That gut instinct matters more than people realize. In my work with divorcing women, I have seen that intuition is frequently backed by objective clues. When a spouse senses something is off and there is at least some factual support, that is usually enough reason to take a closer look.
Over time, certain patterns show up again and again in cases involving hidden money. These are some of the most common warning signs.
We are suddenly poor. The income-earning spouse reports an unexplained drop in pay. Bonuses dry up. Commissions disappear. Meanwhile, the household goes from having extra cash to barely scraping by. In many cases, income is not actually gone. It is being delayed. Compensation may be deferred until after the divorce is finalized so it does not have to be shared.
There is a sudden downturn in the business. When a self-employed spouse claims the business is struggling, timing matters. A dramatic decline that coincides neatly with a pending divorce deserves scrutiny. Income may be diverted to other entities, customers may be billed later, or expenses may be inflated to make the business look less profitable than it really is.
Mail starts going elsewhere. Bank, credit card, or investment statements stop arriving at the house. A post office box appears. Online access becomes restricted. These changes are rarely innocent. When financial mail is rerouted or hidden, it is often because someone does not want you to see what is going on.
There is a history of deception. Past behavior is one of the strongest predictors of future behavior. If your spouse has lied about money before, hidden purchases, or kept financial secrets during the marriage, that pattern is unlikely to stop during divorce. In fact, it often escalates.
If any of these situations sound familiar, the most important thing you can do is stop dismissing your instincts. You do not need absolute proof to justify asking questions or gathering information. A combination of intuition and objective red flags is enough to warrant deeper investigation.
Start by collecting financial documents while you still have access. Bank statements, credit card statements, tax returns, and business records can reveal patterns that are easy to miss when viewed one at a time. Pay attention to changes over time, not just isolated numbers.
Next, get organized. Create a list of accounts you know about and make note of anything that seems to have disappeared or changed suddenly. Organization is power in a divorce, especially when money may be hidden.
You do not have to accuse or confront to take action. Quiet preparation and informed investigation are often the smartest first steps. When money is being concealed, it usually leaves a trail. The key is knowing where to look and being willing to trust what the facts and your instincts are telling you.
