Why Do Women Get Money in a Divorce

I often hear that women get "rewarded" financially for divorce. Statistically, women more often are the recipients of child support or alimony payments. But these payments are no financial "reward." They are payments that contribute to the basic needs of the family after divorce, and usually aren't enough to live on by themselves.

The division of assets isn't any sort of reward during divorce, either. I commonly hear men say "why does she get half o the house I paid for." But that's the wrong way to look at things.

Women often give up their careers to stay home and raise children. Then when a divorce happens, we hear "she didn't pay for this" (whether it's the house, a car, a sofa, or other assets) and and argument is made that the person who was working outside the home owns the assets because "he paid for them." 

No matter whose name is on a paycheck, the earnings are marital funds.* Martial funds belong to BOTH the husband and the wife. Those marital funds make the mortgage payment, therefore, both husband and wife paid for the house. They own the house together, and the value of it will be split in the divorce.

And even if someone did wrong things in the marriage, the assets are owned by both the husband and the wife, and therefore they are divided. This isn't a reward or penalty to either party, it's simply an acknowledgement that they both own the things and they should each walk away from the marriage with their share of them.

If one person owned property before the marriage, whether or not that will be divided will be depend on state law. In some states, that property becomes marital property once they get married. In many states the property will stay the separate property of the person who brought it into the marriage, but  circumstances during the marriage could change this. It can get complicated.

Please remember that both spouses make valuable contributions to the marriage. One may work outside of the home and bring home a paycheck. But the household functions because of the spouse at home. The children are alive because the spouse at home kept them alive and did most of the raising and nurturing of them. These contributions to the family are routinely devalued during divorce.

The division of assets and the payment of support are not "rewards" for divorce. They represent a fair division of the finances when the marriage is ending.

* - This may be different if you have a prenuptial agreement.