I often get asked what the leading causes of divorce are. With almost 700,000 divorces filed every year in the United States, it is an important question. Many divorce filings cite the reason of “irreconcilable differences,” but what does that really mean? It’s just a generic description indicating that the husband and wife can no longer be married.
One of the most common reasons for divorce is infidelity. Romantic affairs are all too common, and they are expensive. If your husband has been engaged in an affair, you need to make sure to look at your family’s finances, because it’s likely he spent YOUR money on his mistress.
Another very common cause of divorce is the lack of support in the home. This means that one spouse doesn’t contribute to maintaining the household, or raising the children, or both. Women are most often the ones who suffer in this regard. They often leave their careers to raise the family, but then find that their husbands contribute very little time or effort to caring for the children or helping the household function.
Divorce is often a result of incompatibility, too. Spouses find that they “grow apart” or have extremely different approaches to things that really matter, such as child rearing, financial management, political views, or religion. While couples often do talk about these things before marriage, when you get into these issues further on a daily basis, that’s when you find that your differences may be insurmountable.
There are many other reasons that can factor into divorce: domestic violence, lack of commitment, poor communication, lack of intimacy, unemployment or underemployment, financial stress, significant medical issues of a spouse or child, or mental health problems. Divorce is complicated, but no matter your reason for seeking a divorce, you should know that you can come out of the process even better than before.