When you are standing at the edge of divorce, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. Friends and family will be quick to offer advice, and while they mean well, they usually don’t have the experience to guide you through the financial and legal minefield ahead. Divorce professionals, on the other hand, know what really makes a difference. We’ve seen the mistakes, the wins, and the costly missteps.
I want to share with you some of those insider tips… the money secrets that can give you a stronger footing before you even file for divorce. These aren’t just nice-to-have ideas. They are critical moves that can protect you and set you up for a better outcome.
1. Find the Right Attorney
Divorce is complicated, and you don’t want to go into it without the right advocate. A strong attorney does more than just file paperwork. He or she explains your rights under the law, makes sure your divorce papers are prepared properly, and most importantly, fights to protect your best interests. Do not settle for the first lawyer you meet. Interview a few, ask plenty of questions, and trust your gut. The attorney you choose can make or break your case.
2. Gather Evidence Before You File
Once the divorce process starts, getting access to information can become much harder. Right now, while you still have access, collect everything you can: bank statements, credit card records, retirement account balances, and tax returns. Don’t forget about screenshots of social media posts, text messages, or anything else that could be relevant. Your attorney will be able to use this information to build a stronger case for you.
3. Build Your Divorce Team
You might think you only need an attorney, but the truth is, divorce can touch every part of your life: emotional, financial, and even professional. Consider other experts who can help you through the process: a therapist, a divorce coach, a career advisor, or a forensic accountant if money is missing or you suspect hidden assets. Yes, it costs money to bring in professionals, but it can actually save you money in the long run by avoiding mistakes and making sure you negotiate from a position of strength.
4. Learn Your Finances Inside and Out
If you’ve been hands-off with the money in your marriage, now is the time to change that. You need to know what assets you have, what debts you’re responsible for, and what your current expenses look like. Write it all down. This financial snapshot will help you and your attorney figure out what you’ll need to support yourself and your children after the divorce. Don’t underestimate this step—it’s one of the most powerful things you can do for yourself.
5. Save Money Now
Even if you can only put aside a little at a time, start building a cushion for yourself. Divorce often comes with surprise expenses like legal fees, moving costs, childcare needs. Having money set aside can give you security and independence when you need it most. Think of it as a safety net.
6. Open Accounts in Your Own Name
Financial independence starts with having accounts that your spouse cannot touch. Open a checking account, a savings account, and a credit card in your name only. This ensures you’ll have access to money no matter what happens with your joint accounts. These accounts are not just about dollars, they represent your first steps toward financial freedom.
7. Start Thinking About Work
If you haven’t been working outside the home, it’s time to look at your options. Even if you expect alimony or child support, those payments are not guaranteed to last forever. Having your own income means having control over your future. Start updating your resume, researching job openings, or looking into additional training. The earlier you begin, the better position you’ll be in when you need to rely on yourself.
8. Understand Your Legal Rights
Divorce laws vary from state to state, and it’s important to know what applies to you. How are assets divided? How is support calculated? Who is responsible for debts? Knowing the rules will help you manage your expectations and avoid surprises. Your attorney will explain these things, but it helps to do some research on your own so you can ask informed questions.
The Bottom Line
Preparing for divorce is about more than filling out paperwork. It’s about protecting yourself, your money, and your future. The choices you make before you file will shape the outcome of your case and your financial life for years to come.
You don’t have to figure this out alone. That’s why I created the Divorce STRATEGY Guide. It’s a step-by-step plan to help you be smart, be strategic, and win your divorce. You only get one shot at your settlement, so make sure you do it right.
