Money Is the #1 Reason for Divorce

Research surrounding divorce often concludes that the most common reason for divorce is money. Sometimes it is a fundamentally different approach to personal finance, but other time the problem relates to money secrets.

Money issues that can cause significant discord in a marriage include concealing financial matters (like secret purchases or secret credit cards), high levels of debt, or large unexpected expenses (such as high medical bills or major home repairs). Of course there are a variety of money arguments that can lead to divorce.

The top 10 most common money issues that have an impact on divorce rates include:

1. Differences in how you fundamentally view money - Some people are spenders, while others are savers. One spouse may be seen as a reckless spender, while the other might be seen as too budget-conscious and unwilling to spend money.
2. Mismatched financial priorities - Beyond the issue of saving versus spending, there are differences in priorities when it comes to what money is spent on. Does one spouse want to buy a house while the other would prefer to rent an apartment and travel the world.
3. High debts - Having debts hanging over your head can cause an incredible amount of stress. Whether it's credit card debt, student loans, auto loans, medical debt, or personal loans.... the monthly payments can add up quickly and may even be more than your household income. The stress is even greater if one person is racking up the debts while the other one feels like they're left paying for it.
4. Spending more than you make - If your family routinely spends more money than is coming in each month, ti can create a great deal of stress. If you spend more than you make, you'll either have to incur debt or dip into savings to pay for things. Either way, it's not sustainable indefinitely.
5. Lack of clarity on roles related to money - It is important to be clear about who has which money responsibilities in the marriage. Who makes sure certain bills are paid? Who keeps track of savings and long-term financial goals? Who keeps an eye on your investments and retirement funds? If you're not clear, some of these responsibilities could fall through the cracks or you could be stepping on each other's toes when checking up on things.
6. Unwillingness to compromise - Whether you and your spouse have a different money philosophy or different spending habits, marriage requires compromise. You'll have to find some middle ground that works for both of you. If one or both of the spouses is unwilling to find this middle ground, it signals trouble for the marriage.
7. Financial infidelity - Lying about money or keeping money secrets can be a huge source of discord. No one wants to be lied to, especially about an important topic like money. Concealed spending, secret accounts, and reckless handling of money are all sure to cause arguments that can lead to divorce.
8. Unexpected major expenses - A huge expense like a new roof on the house, a high medical bill, or a new car can cause a great deal of stress in the marriage. This is especially true if you do not have savings to cover the expense, and have to borrow money or use a credit card to pay for it. Not only do you have the stress of the expense itself, but you could also end up with ongoing debt payments that create problems.
9. Lack of control over the finances - If one spouse wants more control over the money than he or she currently has, it can lead to disagreements. When you're single, you make all the spending decisions on your own. Having to talk things over and compromise may leave one or both of you feeling lIke you don't have enough control over the money.
10. Disagreements over who owns what - Spouses may disagree about who is paying bills or how costs will be divided. If one souse works and the other does not, there may be an even greater feeling of "mine" and "yours" when it comes to larger asset purchases. Resentment over how money is spent is common.

Communicating openly about money is one of the most important ways that money differences can be overcome. These conversations are best had before you get married, but it is never too late to start talking about money and trying to come to agreements about the money that work better for your family.